Using about 100 English words, introduce and explain one advantage and one disadvantage of online education in a well-developed paragraph.

Introducing online education offers you an option to study at home. As a result, you can save time and effort for commuting to school and devote more of your time to learning itself. This style of education is beneficial for those who have difficulty attending school, especially those who cannot attend because of their physical conditions. There is a downside, however. Introducing education of this kind might deprive you of the opportunity to interact with other students. It is contact with people from all walks of life that could broaden your mind. If you do not share your thoughts and experiences with others, it will be difficult for you to develop your own ideas and mature mentally.

I'd really appreciate it if you corrected my essay. この表現は自然ですか？

Question

Using about 100 English words, introduce and explain one advantage and one disadvantage of online education in a well-developed paragraph.

Introducing online education offers you an option to study at home. As a result, you can save time and effort for commuting to school and devote more of your time to learning itself. This style of education is beneficial for those who have difficulty attending school, especially those who cannot attend because of their physical conditions. There is a downside, however. Introducing education of this kind might deprive you of the opportunity to interact with other students. It is contact with people from all walks of life that could broaden your mind. If you do not share your thoughts and experiences with others, it will be difficult for you to develop your own ideas and mature mentally.

I'd really appreciate it if you corrected my essay. この表現は自然ですか？

gav90 · Accepted Answer

Just a couple of little changes to help the flow 😊

"Introducing online education offers you an option to study at home (and) as a result you can save time and effort for commuting to school, (devoting) more of your time to learning itself. This style of education is beneficial for those who have difficulty attending school, especially those who cannot attend because of their physical conditions.

There is a downside however, introducing education of this kind might deprive you of the opportunity to interact with other students. It is contact with people from all walks of life that can broaden your mind. If you do not share your thoughts and experiences with others, it will be difficult for you to develop your own ideas and mature mentally"

gav90 · Answer

You're very welcome @doru1234 !